In A Sadist Kind Of Way

So earlier today, I had an exchange with a rather peculiar girl. She was nice-looking, like someone you'd have a crush over but never got the courage to tell her about it. She seemed friendly, fun to be with, had a lot of things to say that made sense and actually would help a lot of people. Good fashion sense, witty and rather quirky even.

But a few things made me say that she was rather peculiar. One, even though she posts these rather gorgeous pictures of herself, in very nice dresses and outfits, doing all sorts of poses and moves, there was something in her eyes that was rather off. It was as if her eyes had this look of calling out to you, a "Save me!" kind of expression in her eyes. But that could just be me, being all weird and stuff.

And this is where it gets real. I never noticed if she posted photos of her like these, but she had ones that showed her arms. Believe me there was nothing wrong with the picture at all, she was still her classy-looking self, but what stuck me was the state her arms were in.

One word: MUTILATED.

Yes, she literally cut herself in the arms. Real deep. You can actually see them, even though the photos weren't very detailed. Several scars were very prominent, that you could tell they hurt real bad when she did them. I may have done so myself a few times, but damn. What she did to herself was just scary.

She had her reasons, and I know the other people who did the same things to themselves had theirs, but it really saddens me that it happens too often, and it just grows more and more. I may never be able to understand why someone would put themselves on such an ordeal when clearly, they have suffered enough.I can say all the cliche things that I can about how life gets better, and how our past isn't something to mourn about and other stuff, but I guess only they can turn things around.

This reminds me of Edward Elric, from Fullmetal Alchemist. He and his brother Alphonse were in real deep shit when they tried, and failed, to revive their dead mother, at the cost of Ed's leg and Al's body. Ed was blaming himself the entire time for what happened to his brother and himself, but he didn't beat himself up about it. He may have blamed himself continually, but he never did any harm to himself. Instead, he bettered himself, and supported and cherished those he still had, reaching out for what he could, eventually gaining back what was stolen from him and his brother.

I guess I could never get the hang of dealing with the fact that people continue to hurt themselves for reasons I may never be able to know and comprehend, but I do know one thing.

Only you alone have the power to change how your life would turn out, not your past.

Power of the Tongue

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue."

It's Sunday, and I just came home from church. Hey, don't you dare go all "Oh no, he's gonna be all preachy on us now!" This just came to me while I was sitting there listening to the sermon. It's one of those epiphanies one has in the most unusual of places. Well, I guess that wasn't that unusual in my case.

Well anyways, it came to me on the very first passage that was read, which you already read as well. Taken from the book of Proverbs, one would understand that this can be applied to all aspects of life. Be it in relationships, acquaintances, or even strangers. Words affect our lives, and people in it.

Words can break people, start wars, end relationships, build envy and wrath, and just basically bring out the bad in people. From the moment we were born till the day we die, some words will be too hard for us to bear silently.
From our childhood, we were made to listen to what our elders say, how they threaten us to be taken away by someone if we did bad things, how we might end up being taken away if we didn't eat our veggies or took our afternoon naps.
In school, we got insulted, people take behind our backs, spread rumors, and tell lies to us and those we know. Some words even cut so deep that it makes one snap, making them take the desperate way out, hurting themselves physically more than they already are, even ending their lives. And even worse, other people's lives.
At work, it goes on and on, bosses and co-workers alike will criticize your work, maybe even put you down just to get what they want. Your spouse, or even your kids, can also say the meanest things, out of disappointment, or discontent. Self-esteem and morale can go down with a single word we say. That's why they say that the tongue is like a double-edged sword. You may not see it now, but it'll hurt you too if you're not careful enough.

But words can also be used to soothe the soul, calm the spirit, and alleviate the pains of our hearts. It can motivate a person to move, it can make the simplest of things matter the most for someone. A little girl's cry can be hushed by words spoken warmly and gently. It can build up a lover's excitement over what is to come from a night of unbridled passion for each other. It can calm the shaky voice of a performer, awaiting his chance on the stage. It can unify two souls, oceans apart, as if God had intended for them to be with each other, despite their differences and complexities. Words that can rile up the passion of young souls to do the right thing, for men in power to rise above the system of corruption, for poor men to strive hard and not be a burden to society.

Ladies and gentlemen, words are but an expression of who we are and who we intend to be. They may not be tangible, but they strike hard on those we throw them at, and they caress soothingly to those we warmly utter them to.

Friends and readers, watch the words you use, be it written or spoken. Think before you say or type something you might regret later on. Be careful what the power of the tongue can do to you, and others.