Ok, so I haven't been very religious about posting blogs like everyone else. Sorry about that. (Not that I have a lot of readers to begin with.)
So recently, I have been very VERY busy with my offline life, spending less and less time doing this like this, and also going online just to see who notices the things I post, submit, etc. If anyone would ask me how life is right now, I'll probably shrug and say, "It's cool, doin' okay, just right," and all those lame reflex answers. Yes, reflex answers! Replies to questions like "how are you, what's up, how's it goin'?" when you really can't afford to tell them everything, and mostly, it's the entire opposite of the term OK.
And honestly, it's like a glimpse of Hell every day! I wake up to the sound of my alarms ringing, starting my day really early, but ending it way too late. I spend the whole day being subject to a lot of stressing factors, some of it more annoying than others. I do end up gettin' pissed at some point, but what ticks me off more is that I can't vent it out like other people can. You can say I have anger management issues, which scares me because of the things I thought of that would happen in case something triggers me to "let it all out."
I saw this picture from Cyanide and Happiness, and it gave me a good idea on venting out negativity and crap. But if what the comic depicted happened in my case, it would be like that at all. IT'LL BE MUCH MUCH WORSE.
But yeah, highly unlikely for a jar of pure negative energy explode like that on you. So I guess I'll just have to find another way. It just sucks because I can't really do anything about it that it makes me feel helpless and incapable of coping with it. Also, it aggravates me so much that it actually affects how I do in school, how I go about my daily life, and everything else in between.
So pardon me for not blogging like a maniac, and I do hope that I get to find my "Hate Jar" because I'm having that urge to badmouth someone in particular again.
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16 January, 2011
08 January, 2011
Bad vibes all around!
I promised myself I wouldn't start my 2011 with a negative thought, but it's only been eight days into the new year, and I find myself just wanting to burst into flames from the negativity I have boiling inside me.
So I get home from class, which was a bore if you ask me, all tired and wanting to just ease my way into slumber. But you know what the awful surprise was waiting for me in the kitchen which was adjacent to my room? This girl that I hooked up with, but I let go because she was a promiscuous b*tch! Yeah, that just got me from mellow and chillax, to wanting to kick babies and make little children cry to death!! ARGH!!
I know, I know...I should try to man up and not make a big deal out of it. But she just waltzes around like nothing happened between us! Can you imagine what that would be like, having to see her smug face, all smiling and laughing along with my aunts and uncles.
It just irritates me to the bones! I just wish she disappeared from my life, if not this country! But hopefully, she gets to kiss my sweet ass goodbye FOREVER once I move to the US, which will be pretty soon. Then I'll find someone a whole lot better than her to rub it in her face that she's not worth anything to me at all!
I just hope she gets what she deserves for leaving someone devoted for someone closer to her house. AND SCREW HER! I HOPE SHE GETS PREGNANT FROM BEING SCREWED BY THAT GUY ALMOST EVERY CHANCE THEY GET!
So I get home from class, which was a bore if you ask me, all tired and wanting to just ease my way into slumber. But you know what the awful surprise was waiting for me in the kitchen which was adjacent to my room? This girl that I hooked up with, but I let go because she was a promiscuous b*tch! Yeah, that just got me from mellow and chillax, to wanting to kick babies and make little children cry to death!! ARGH!!
I know, I know...I should try to man up and not make a big deal out of it. But she just waltzes around like nothing happened between us! Can you imagine what that would be like, having to see her smug face, all smiling and laughing along with my aunts and uncles.
It just irritates me to the bones! I just wish she disappeared from my life, if not this country! But hopefully, she gets to kiss my sweet ass goodbye FOREVER once I move to the US, which will be pretty soon. Then I'll find someone a whole lot better than her to rub it in her face that she's not worth anything to me at all!
I just hope she gets what she deserves for leaving someone devoted for someone closer to her house. AND SCREW HER! I HOPE SHE GETS PREGNANT FROM BEING SCREWED BY THAT GUY ALMOST EVERY CHANCE THEY GET!
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