16 January, 2011

Pardon me...

Ok, so I haven't been very religious about posting blogs like everyone else. Sorry about that. (Not that I have a lot of readers to begin with.)

So recently, I have been very VERY busy with my offline life, spending less and less time doing this like this, and also going online just to see who notices the things I post, submit, etc. If anyone would ask me how life is right now, I'll probably shrug and say, "It's cool, doin' okay, just right," and all those lame reflex answers. Yes, reflex answers! Replies to questions like "how are you, what's up, how's it goin'?" when you really can't afford to tell them everything, and mostly, it's the entire opposite of the term OK.

And honestly, it's like a glimpse of Hell every day! I wake up to the sound of my alarms ringing, starting my day really early, but ending it way too late. I spend the whole day being subject to a lot of stressing factors, some of it more annoying than others. I do end up gettin' pissed at some point, but what ticks me off more is that I can't vent it out like other people can. You can say I have anger management issues, which scares me because of the things I thought of that would happen in case something triggers me to "let it all out."



I saw this picture from Cyanide and Happiness, and it gave me a good idea on venting out negativity and crap. But if what the comic depicted happened in my case, it would be like that at all. IT'LL BE MUCH MUCH WORSE.

But yeah, highly unlikely for a jar of pure negative energy explode like that on you. So I guess I'll just have to find another way. It just sucks because I can't really do anything about it that it makes me feel helpless and incapable of coping with it. Also, it aggravates me so much that it actually affects how I do in school, how I go about my daily life, and everything else in between.

So pardon me for not blogging like a maniac, and I do hope that I get to find my "Hate Jar" because I'm having that urge to badmouth someone in particular again.

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