Release the inner demon.

So after weeks of stress, it's finally over. But this is just the calm before the storm. I'll be a Senior in a few day's time. Something I both dread and look forward to. But before that, let me tell you something "memorable" that happened to me last night.

(The reason I quote-unquote the word memorable is because I never really remembered much about last night. So yeah, things will be unclear in some part from here on out. Bear with me on this, reader.)

So yesterday, I went to this outing with a couple of my friends. I was looking forward to having a good time, just chilling and such. And that I did! It was a great place, very relaxing even though it was humid and we had to travel approximately 4 hours to get to the venue. But it was really a good feeling to be out of the hustle-and-bustle of the urban setting, and also to be out of the stresses I was immersed in, both at home and at campus. So yeah, I enjoyed every second.

But the morning after was awkward. I heard my friends chatting about things that happened last night. I can relate to some of them, but a lot was amiss. I tried to recall what happened when things progressed towards the evening. But it failed.

CONCLUSION: I was definitely drunk last night.

As they pressed on, sharing their perspective of last night, it hit me like a baseball bat as they told things I had done the night before. They saw me at my worst. Something that I'm not opt to show to anybody. They told me that I was so active and loud, that I cursed, and that I said things that were inappropriate, things that really shook me, almost toppling me off my bamboo seat.

They saw a part of me that was locked up inside a cage. Something I try to fight as much as I can. A totally different person, if I may say so. A part of me that I fear myself. Kinda like the case of Jekyll and Hyde. Except, my elixir was not so uncommon to the common man.

Yes, I may have drank more that I could usually take, but I guess my inhibitions died plainly because I was stressed out of my wits for months now. It may seem like a defense mechanism to say that stress was the reason I turned out like that last night, but to me it really was. I see no other reason for it.

Things got the better of me. Things that I could have resolved and avoided.

Yes, I AM WEAK. I could not control the inner demons I had deep inside, brought about by wrong decisions and influences. So I guess even good guys do bad things as well.

Let's just hope it won't have dire consequences.