Year ender!

Holy shit balls, Batman! It's New's Years Eve!
Bloody hell, a year has passed, and what do I have to answer for? Absolutely nothing! I have accomplished little to none besides trophies on Playstation Network (add me! experiment727)! Perfect use of my time as I was forced to wait for months just to be let down. I've been here in the States for 9 months now, and most of the time I spent here were wasted away by waiting and dilly-dallying. Needless to say, this year sucked for me.

I've been feeling so out of it since Christmas, to be honest. For some reason, I wasn't as excited as I was back when I was in the Philippines. Maybe its the fact that celebrations back home were so much more vibrant and lively than it is here. Sure, I was in a family party like I used to back then, but it felt like I was far away from everyone. Like something was missing, or I was looking for something. Maybe it was the cousins and siblings I left back home, maybe it was the fact that I didn't know everyone in that room, but sure enough, my mind was somewhere else.

It's like the feeling of excitement about the holidays wasn't getting to me. As if the little boy inside me died and withered away, leaving nothing but a cold husk that is the older me. I once read a joke that the older you get, the less you look forward to Christmas. Hopefully, I regain my "spirit of Christmas" before I turn into a common Scrooge.

As for the New Year, I still recall how things were already warming up in the morning, with a few pops resounding down the street as kids and adults alike lit firecrackers and threw them to whomever unfortunate fellow stumbles on it. News of people injured because of fireworks welcome you along with morning coffee. The smell of blackpowder looming in the air. And when the countdown begins, you begin to question how you will survive all the blasts and flares going on and on for a few minutes all around you. But you sure feel that the celebration was, excuse my pun, a blast.

I miss it, being happy and excited over something such as a day celebrated unlike any other.

The birth of a Saviour, sent down to redeem the sins of all who lived and ever will live. A new beginning in the sense that things changed dramatically with His arrival.

And the end of a year, and the start of another. Resolutions are spoken, old ways are gone. A end to either the best days of one's life, or the start of a year filled with dreams and ambition.

Hopefully I too will find such hope and fervor.